The Worst Experience turn to be The Strongest Motivation

hi… how do u do??^^

well…in this post, i would like to share something quite personal about my worst experience at my Campus that i ever went through. i wish no one judge what is right and what is wrong after reading this, but on contrary, i wish anyone who read this, could be more encourage and learn something priceless and meaningful in the same time… =)

in 2008, there was a scholarship called: beswan Djarum. it was a scholarship given by Djarum company for university students who possess good GPA and leadership. those chosen students will got opportunity to improve their leadership ability through some trainings in java for free, receive monthly allowances =) & joining scientific writing competition with fantastic price: 27 million rupiah for the first winner (nice o.p. huh??!!)

then, some of my friends joined the selection… and the result declared that no one passed. so, the company open another or second selection in my univ… some students register (me too). i was so excited and passion about that scholarship. so, i told to our vise dean for students affair that i would like to participate. let just called her Mrs.H.

“Mrs. H, i would like to register for the second selection for Djarum scholarship…” i said excited and confidently^^

“…oh.. i’m sorry… we have achieve the quota already, so we closed the registration!” she said.

….OMG!!! the was the worst news i ever heard, because it is the only chance for me to join the scholarship, since next year is the turn for another V semester students…

“So the registration is full already??” i asked her for the second time

“…Yes…” she say doubtfully

What else can i do??????? i have to give that dream up eventually T.T

the day after that, one of my best friend came to me and said that she was just asked by Mrs.H to join the Djarum scholarship and asked her to look for another 2 students who are active at class and in organization to join the scholarship program….

OMG…. -WHAT THE H..L!!!- HOW COULD SHE (Mrs.H) just asked my friend to join the selection today!!! while yesterday she said to me that the registration is full already!!!! how on earth she could do that to me??? did i have a very bad performance at campus??? is that fair??? do you know how it feels when my friend said that… >.<

then i told to my friend that yesterday i just be rejected by her and now she said she looking for another 2 students????, and u know what my friend say?? she said that i’m not serious enough about this scholarship… OMG!!! i cut the conversation with her, go home directly, get to my room and lock the door!!!! i’m crying… very very disappointed with Mrs.H. ……… and that was the time when i started to hate her… very much dislike her. even sometime we met coincidentally face to face, i’m not even smile or show respect, just ignore her and keep walking. (note: finally, no one join the second selection unless one of my best friend…)

when she taught me at physical chemistry II class, i learn seriously at class and at home…. my purpose is to make she feel sorry for what she have done to me by performing very well at class. believe me… that was the moment when i hate hate hate her very much!!!!

few weeks after that moment, my university held an English debate competition, and the winner will be sent to National level to compete in Jakarta. well… now is her job again to look for some students to join this competition… she asked my best friend again to join the competition, but my friend say no because her English is not very well to compete in university level. and she suggest me… u know what, Mrs.H look for me, and asked me to join the competition… without any guilty feeling she asked me. obviously she forget that she ever turned down me for Djarum scholarship… I SAY NO!!! i love English actually and i’m so excited… but I SAY NO TO MRS. H. Remembering what she has done towards me, i will never forgive her!/…. but she insist.,,…??? ok.. then i couldn’t say no again, i have no choice and i make a team with my medical student friends…

do u know what happened??? my team won the first place in our faculty n we move forward to university level. in university level, we passed the qualification selection by defeating 4 team from another faculties and thus perform in semi-final. we did it again, and we go to final! finally, our team won the third place in university level. and i was so happy and proud of myself. many lecturers congrats us, include Mrs.H.

since that moment, every time our university held competition, she will look for me first! i joined another competitions with her support. i won the first place Best Achievement Student at Faculty, University, and Rewarded as National Best Achievement Student 2009 by Directorate General of Higher Education in Indonesia. i was so proud of everything… and i start to forgive her… slow but certain…

now, i have forgive her^^ i left my past behind, and keep move forward… i would like to say thank you to Mrs.H because if wasn’t her, who will be that mean to me?? how will make me experience the worst thing ever which now turn to be the strongest motivation to move forward. Who will support me that much after all??^^ thanks you very much…

what i would like to say is… life is cruel. perhaps much crueler than what i ever experienced. just like when we apply in a company, they will take person that they think qualified for them and reject the others. it is the time to give our best. today!!! or it will be too late to start…^^ and one more thing, may be if we could forgive someone who has hurt us very much, we actually is the winner of ourselves. =)

thank you, hopefully this post could inspiring U all. God Bless U…

ellen k.


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About ellenkusnadi

hi... i'm ellen.. i love traveling, adventuring, watching movie, reading, learning English and Espanol,... ^^ i have million of dreams, billions of plans, but i believe in Jesus who will decide the best for me... i always do the best for everything that become my responsibility... with one motto: ANOTHER PLACE IS POSSIBLE^^ when i was a kid, my mom said that i'm a spoiled n superrrr silence girl... tragic! isn't it???? (hehehe^^), but now, i left that all behind, i keep it as my childhood experience. since i grow up, my maturities grows as well, i always try to not depand myself on others, try the best every time n in every things. in this blog i wrote anything that me myself experienced, all the people n event involved help me to understand that i have so much blessed from God which is priceless. thanks God, Thanks Jesus^^ love -Ellen K.-
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One Response to The Worst Experience turn to be The Strongest Motivation

  1. ellen says:

    p.s. : Mrs.H indeed say “sorry…” to me at 4 December 2010 🙂
    OMG… after 2 years… i never expect that 2 be happened… because i have forget that moment n forgive her long long long time ago… but nice to hear that… really…
    this is may be sth that i want to hear few years ago… but never expect it again now.
    Thanks Jesus… this is truly Your way… she felt sorry about something when You has lead me to forgive her long time ago…
    Thanks Jesus^^

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